Thursday: December 7, 2006
i dunnoe wats going on rite now...
why im always angry...
upset and disappointed...
easily irritated and pissed...
i stayed up late at night...
wake up early in the morning...
yet nothing...
no missed calls from you...
no msgs from you...
nothing...
i guessed you called me to
bcoz i didnt called you the whole day...
thats bcoz i chose not to...
bcoz i dun want to be upset or disappointed wif you...
for not being able to spare a few mins for me...
n i dun understand why u cudnt do so...
even for 5mins???
i know you're busy...
i understand that...
bcoz thats just the way your werk is...
bt i cudnt understand why you cant understand me...
its unfair for me...
i dun see why you cudnt commit juz a lil of your time...
like i did for you even though i was sitting for my 'A's...
i've always tried not to neglect my commitments to you...
no matter wat the situation is...
bt why cudnt you do the same thing for me too???
did i ask for too much???
i dont know...
n you've always told me that you will always be there for me...
bt have you been reali doing that???
i dont know...
i dont even know wats going thru my head now...
anrgy???upset???disappointed???
u name it...
FYI...
i chose not to call you bcoz i didnt want to make it look as if im desperate...
coz for fact...IM NOT...
if you say im egoistic...
thats ok...
it doesnt move me a single bit...
bt im terribly disappointed that you let it be the way it is...
you dun even bother to msg or call me...
even when you know im angry with you...
im sorie...
i guess thats the reason...
for my actions...
for my attitude...
and for my behaviour towards you...
im sorie...
i dont want to argue...
im sick and tired of arguing with you...
you shud know me well by now...
after all that has happen throughout 4.7yrs...
things happen recurringly...
always repeating itself...
why cant you see and realise that???
i dont know...
maybe you reali didnt see it...
or maybe you chose not to see it...
i dont know...
im a NOBODY to make decisions for you...
a NOBODY who can only make judgements...
